“The prudence of the best heads is often defeated by the tenderness of the best hearts” (Henry Fielding).
AMONG THE VIRTUES VALUED TODAY, TENDERHEARTEDNESS IS ONE OF THE LEAST VALUED. In the minds of many, tough-mindedness is the key to success in the real world, and tenderness is seen more as a weakness than a strength. The truth, however, is that tenderness can solve a much wider range of problems than the decrees of authority or the dominion of brute force. In the history of our world, the people who have exerted the greatest real power — power to build rather than destroy — have always been people with tender hearts, full of grace and kindness.
The word “tenderheartedness” can mean two different things, both of which are valuable. In modern usage, tenderheartedness often means compassion. It means that one is easily moved by another’s distress. In this sense, the person with a tender heart is one who can be touched by someone else’s suffering and is willing to respond with mercy. Surely, this is a virtue worth including in our character.
But tenderheartedness can mean something else: it can mean that a person has a tender conscience. Unlike the individual who has allowed his conscience to become hard and insensitive, the tenderhearted person has a conscience that’s in good working order. When it is pointed out that he has erred, he is touched by that fact. His heart is still tender enough to feel genuine, healthy remorse for his failings. And like other kinds of tenderness, tenderness of conscience is a potent force, a strength with impressive capabilities. It allows the person who possesses it to do something the tough are rarely able to do: take honest steps of growth and personal improvement.
There are few gifts we can give to others that are more beneficial than our own tenderheartedness. Whether it’s tenderness of compassion or tenderness of conscience, this is a quality that can do powerful, life-changing good. It can move mountains — mountains at which the “strong” can only curse. And one of the most remarkable things about it is that, while life lasts, it is never completely out of our reach. Even the hardest heart can become more tender if it’s willing to make that choice and embrace the process of change.
“When death, the great reconciler, has come, it is never our tenderness that we regret, but our severity” (George Eliot).
Gary Henry – WordPoints.com + AreYouaChristian.com
