{"id":11834,"date":"2025-12-09T19:27:17","date_gmt":"2025-12-09T19:27:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/?p=11834"},"modified":"2025-12-09T19:27:17","modified_gmt":"2025-12-09T19:27:17","slug":"why-guests-dont-come-to-your-church-after-a-big-event","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/?p=11834","title":{"rendered":"Why guests don\u2019t come to your church after a big event"},"content":{"rendered":"


By Thom S. Rainer<\/span><\/span>, Op-ed Contributor Sunday, December 07, 2025<\/span>Facebook\/Barbecue Baptist<\/span><\/p>\n

For six straight years, a church in a mid-sized town hosted one of the best community barbeques you could imagine. The food was incredible. Smokers fired up at dawn, volunteers served mountains of pulled pork and ribs, and the aroma drifted across the neighborhood like an open invitation. People came from everywhere \u2014 families with kids, retirees looking for conversation, even city officials. The average attendance? About 650 every year. Not bad for a church that worshiped around 175 on Sundays.<\/p>\n

The church members loved the event. They called it their \u201cannual outreach.\u201d They worked hard, smiled big, and sincerely hoped people would come to church the next day \u2014 or maybe the next Sunday. But here\u2019s the punch line: after six years, the number of guests who actually showed up for worship was zero. Not one family. Not one curious visitor.<\/p>\n

The members scratched their heads. \u201cWe feed them,\u201d one said. \u201cWe\u2019re friendly,\u201d another added. \u201cWe give out flyers and put signs everywhere.\u201d They couldn\u2019t understand why a crowd of hundreds could enjoy the food, enjoy the people, and never darken the doors of the church building.<\/p>\n

This church\u2019s story isn\u2019t unusual. I\u2019ve seen it in towns across America. Churches put tremendous energy and money into events \u2014 fall festivals, concerts, car shows, you name it \u2014 and then wonder why no one returns. It\u2019s not that the events are bad. In fact, they\u2019re often excellent. The problem is deeper \u2014 and it\u2019s rarely about the barbeque.<\/p>\n

Members do not connect with the guests beyond the event<\/strong><\/p>\n

Most church members assume friendliness and connection are the same thing. They\u2019re not. Smiling while handing someone a plate of barbeque is nice \u2014 but it\u2019s not a relationship. Saying \u201cGlad you came!\u201d as a family walks away is courteous \u2014 but it\u2019s not connection. At most big church events, the interaction stops the moment the guests leave the parking lot.<\/p>\n

The folks in that barbeque church were genuinely kind people. They worked hard, served food with enthusiasm, and even prayed that people would visit the church afterward. But when the event ended, they went home, tired but satisfied that they had \u201cdone outreach.\u201d They didn\u2019t realize outreach hadn\u2019t even begun.<\/p>\n

True connection happens when church members step beyond the event itself. It\u2019s when a member sits with a guest at a picnic table and asks about their family. It\u2019s when someone follows up with a simple text saying, \u201cIt was great to meet you today \u2014 let\u2019s grab coffee sometime.\u201d It\u2019s when members invite guests into their homes, not just to their church.<\/p>\n

Most unchurched people aren\u2019t looking for a church event \u2014 they\u2019re looking for a relationship. They\u2019ll gladly attend something that\u2019s fun and free, but what touches their hearts is genuine interest and care. Until church members learn to move from event-based friendliness to person-based connection, the gap between the crowd at the barbeque and the congregation on Sunday will remain.<\/p>\n

Members outsource evangelism<\/strong><\/p>\n

Somewhere along the way, many church members started believing that evangelism could be delegated \u2014 outsourced, like a maintenance contract. The thinking goes something like this: \u201cIf we host a big enough event, the pastor or staff can handle the Gospel part.\u201d The event becomes a convenient substitute for personal witness. It feels spiritual without the risk of actually talking about Jesus.<\/p>\n

That barbeque church fell right into this trap. The members truly believed the event was evangelism. After all, it had the word \u201coutreach\u201d printed on the flyers. They assumed that by cooking, serving, and smiling, they were fulfilling the Great Commission. Meanwhile, no one shared their story of faith. No one prayed with a neighbor. No one extended an invitation beyond, \u201cGlad you came \u2014 see you next year.\u201d<\/p>\n

It\u2019s easy to see why this happens. Talking about faith can feel uncomfortable. What if the person rejects you? What if you don\u2019t know how to answer their questions? So, instead of engaging in personal evangelism, many church members hide behind programs. The event becomes a shield \u2014 a safe way to \u201cdo evangelism\u201d without ever mentioning Jesus\u2019 name.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s the reality: no event, no matter how big or well-run, can replace believers who personally share the hope of Christ. Outreach is never effective when it\u2019s outsourced. The Gospel moves forward through relationships, conversations, and invitations \u2014 one person at a time. The barbeque can open the door, but someone still has to walk through it.<\/p>\n

The event is not connected to the church\u2019s mission<\/strong><\/p>\n

One of the biggest mistakes churches make is treating big events as stand-alone moments instead of part of an ongoing mission. The barbeque was great \u2014 people came, laughed, and ate \u2014 but no one ever explained why the church was doing it in the first place. The guests left thinking it was just a nice community gathering. They never connected the event to the gospel or the mission of the church.<\/p>\n

When events are disconnected from the mission, they become ends in themselves. The win becomes \u201ca great turnout\u201d instead of \u201ca changed life.\u201d Churches count the number of hot dogs served instead of the number of conversations that lead to Christ. Over time, the event becomes a tradition \u2014 a thing the church does because it has always done it. And somewhere along the way, the mission gets lost in the smoke of the grill.<\/p>\n

But when an event is clearly tied to the church\u2019s purpose \u2014 loving people, making disciples, pointing to Jesus \u2014 everything changes. Members begin to see the barbeque not as an end, but as a means. They pray for people by name. They follow up intentionally. They talk about why the church exists and Who it exists for.<\/p>\n

A church on mission never wastes an event. Whether it\u2019s a barbeque, a fall festival, or a concert, every gathering becomes a step in the journey of helping people meet Christ. The event ends \u2014 but the mission never does.<\/p>\n

Originally published at Church Answers.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Thom S. Rainer is the founder and CEO of Church Answers, an online community and resource for church leaders. Prior to founding Church Answers, Rainer served as president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources. Before coming to LifeWay, he served at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary for twelve years where he was the founding dean of the Billy Graham School of Missions and Evangelism. He is a 1977 graduate of the University of Alabama and earned his Master of Divinity and Ph.D. degrees from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Thom S. Rainer, Op-ed Contributor Sunday, December 07, 2025Facebook\/Barbecue Baptist For six straight years, a church in a mid-sized town hosted one of the best community barbeques you could imagine. The food was incredible. Smokers fired up at dawn, volunteers served mountains of pulled pork and ribs, and the aroma drifted across the neighborhood<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":11835,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[195,82,384,603,3038],"class_list":["post-11834","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-christian-living","tag-big","tag-church","tag-dont","tag-event","tag-guests"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11834","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11834"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11834\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/11835"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11834"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11834"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/biblelon.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11834"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}